Goldilocks Panto
Goldilocks and The Three Bears
Milton Keynes Theatre (UK Tour)
Review Complete
“A Gold-i-locks of a Panto.”
11th December 2025
The set looks like it had just stepped out of the Palladium. It was excellent and really played well the big Milton Keyne's Stage. they say there was over 7.000 bulbs to illuminate the stage, and it was impressive.
Now for the cast. Well leading the whole show was showman himself Brian Conley who played Billy Barnum. Along with his Mother Dame Betty Barnum played by the veteran performer David Robbins. Goldilocks was played by his real-life daughter Lucy Conley.
As for the baddie well Baron Von Blackheart was played by Gary Milner and he was good at getting the audience to hiss very well. He even started that he likes to be hissed a lot. He was very good at accents. Baron and Billy had some hilarious impromptu scenes together, along some adlib exchanges, or were they?
The amount of costume changes that Dame Betty Barnum (David Banum), went through truly outstanding, But I would have liked to have seen more of her (Him). Lots of costume changes but not some many lines.
The Magical Mysterioso (Phil Hitchcock) did some stage illusions throughout the show and was pivotal in rescuing Goldilocks at one point. The Timbuktu Tumblers did a fantastic display of tumbling skills in the opening of the second act.
Credit where credit is due the three bears Joshua Lay (Daddy Bear), Lauren Bimson (Mummy Bear) and Charlotte Pourret (Baby Bear) were outstanding, they even tap danced with the ensemble in full bear costume.
With some songs specially composed by Lucy Conley and Adam O’Connor. the musical supervisor Gary Hind and musically directed by Josh Sood. Mike Coltman did a fantastic job of costumes and construction. Also, Jane McMurttrie certainly put the cast through their paces with brilliant choreography. The show was direct by Kathryn Rooney, which I suspect she spent a lot of time keep Brian Conley in check.
Keeping the audience engaged Brian with well established comedic bones, has the audience in the palm of his hand. With funny one liners, audience engagement, along with adult humour (sometimes a little near the edge) and lots of references to ‘farting’ which was a little over the top. But then it is Panto and that what they do!
Lucy Conley (Brian’s Daughter) and his on stage daughter as well. She has a superb voice and with depth and clarity. Billy (Brian) Goldilocks (Lucy) have a loving moment towards the end when the audience are treated to a ‘tearjerker’ moment, This could only work between a real Father and Daughter.
There is one part of the show where Billy Barnum flies out from the stage over the audience on a motorbike. Not sure what the relevance of this was or to the plot but seemed more like something Brian wanted to do.
So overall, this was not your traditional Goldilocks and the three bears, in fact rather a slim connection really. More leaning towards the greatest showman. But nevertheless, a great fun family packed ‘night out’ of a panto. Brian is Brian and does what he has and what he does so well and that is ‘to entertain’.
The show runs with various performances until 11 January 2026. Tickets available from £15 per person. Run time; 60 minutes, 20 minute interval, 60 minutes. Matinee performances available. For group bookings call 020 7206 1174.
General ticket bookings: CLICK HERE
Reviewer: Mark Bilsby
Photography: at source
We are Gifted tickets so that in return we may give an honest review. All comments are those of the reviewer and theirs alone.